Demon Critic: Osmosis Jones review

Time for the next review, shall we? Enjoy.

Osmosis Jones review

DJ is seen in his seat as usual, but wearing an outfit that is similar to a doctor. "Hello there, I am Dr. ShadowDJ. And I am here to say that I know an antibody that saved the life of a man. This antibody is only known as…Osmosis Jones."

(Shows the title for the movie as some music plays)

"Okay, ever hear of a good health film?" asked DJ, looking serious.

(Random audience: WHAT?)

"I know that's a bit hard to swallow, but this movie was actually pretty good." Said DJ with a shrug.

(Nevil: Your work disgusts me)

"Shut up." DJ said plainly. "Lets begin this Medical Warner movie, shall we?"

(Shows the first scene of the movie)

"We start the movie with a microscope?" asked DJ, confused

(Shows the cell-like logo for Warner Bros.)

"Figures this company try to make a medical film." DJ said, rolling his eyes slightly

(Then it shows the Title in a place full of atoms)

"That is the smallest title in history." DJ said, surprised as he saw this. "Okay, so we start in the weirdest place for the movie…"

(Then it shows Frank and Shane near a Chimp exhibit)

"We get Bill Murray and Elena Franklin." DJ said plainly. "Yep, Bill and Elena play Frank and Shane Detorre, a family of a father-and-daughter sort of thing."

"Just so you know, Frank has one tiny problem; he's a slob." DJ said plainly.

(Shows a chimp stealing an egg from Frank)

DJ then chuckled and says, "A monkey just stole a guy's egg. That is just harsh."

(Frank: Give me the egg!)

DJ chuckled again and says "Sorry, Can't take ya seriously dude. But then this happens."

(The monkey drops it, out of its mouth, and onto the hay at the bottom)

DJ looked grossed out and says, "Gross! That is sick, but I hope that Frank won't…"

(Frank then eats that egg)

DJ's face turned dark green at this. DJ then gets a barf bag and begins to throw up, as Kurumu showed up and patted his back, helping him out. "You okay, Deej?" asked Kurumu.

DJ coughed a bit and nods. "Yeah, just a big grossed out. What excuse was to eat that egg off of the floor of a dirty cage?"

(Frank: 10 second rule: hits the ground, you can eat it within 10 seconds)

DJ and Kurumu both looked grossed out as Kurumu left. DJ then says, "Anyway…after your stomach processes that scene, we go into Frank's mouth. Great…I'm seeing the colon of Bill Murray."

(Shows the inside of Frank's mouth, which was animated)

"Nice animation." DJ said, impressed. "I thought Misaki had good style."

(Then it shows a Helicopter, and then shows Osmosis reading a type of magazine)

"And now we're meeting up with our hero, Osmosis Jones himself, voiced by Chris Rock. Want to know why that sounds familiar?"

(Ozzy: See this Badge? See this gun? See this white membrane over my personhood?)

(Marty the Zebra: This place is crack-a-lakin!)

DJ then asks, "That's Marty the Zebra's voice! Anyway, apparently in this movie, cells and germs are alien-like beings that live inside of a human being."

"Anyway, while chasing some germs that were on the egg-that figures-and when Ozzy was able to get to one of them…this happens"

(Ozzy fires his gun, which released a strange, glowing ball)

"That's kind of cool…" DJ said, watching.

(Then it goes to the right of the weird car, hitting the circuits)

DJ cringed and says, "That can't be good…"

(Ozzy: Dang! Always swings to the right)

DJ nods and says "Yep. But apparently that line of wires was what kept a cramp from happening, so you can guess what happened."

(The leg-muscles began to crush the buildings, as Ozzy screamed before getting crushed.)

DJ cringed and says "Ouch."

(Ozzy: Officer down!)

"Big time." Said DJ, with a cringe. "Anyway, in the mouth, two white blood cells were still cleaning up the egg. Jeez, all that mayo and pepper must be hard to clean."

"While one of them was chasing a little imp, the one cleaning up the egg was killed by something…"

(Cell 2: Artie? You there? Artie?)

DJ then says "But then this happens…"

(The egg then began to fall apart, revealing…Thrax!)

DJ was shocked at this. "Is that…" DJ began

(Ivan Ooze: Ladies and Gentlemen! Ivan Ooze is back!)

"Alright, it isn't Ivan Ooze. This is Thrax, the main villain of the movie. Voiced by Laurence Fishburne. Where is he from again?"

Suddenly a split screen appeared as Tohokari-Steel appeared. "He's only my all time favorite actor!"

"Steel?" asked DJ, surprised.

"Yeah, it's me." Steel said, "Anyway, I remember when I first heard Laurence Fishburne in action. I saw, or in this case, heard, him in Osmosis Jones and heard his voice again in Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer, one of my guilty pleasure movies..."

DJ shoved the split screen away as he says, "Anyway…Thrax himself is one of the best villains around. With his slimy voice, evil appearance and dangerous powers makes him a cool villain. Just watch his villainy in action!"

(Thrax smirks a bit as he went over to the Cleaner.)

(Cleaner: Holy Spit…)

DJ watched, as he saw Thrax go up to the cleaner.

(Thrax: Careful, I'm contagious. (He then pokes the guy with his glowing claw, making the cell glow red and begin to fall apart))

"Ouch." DJ said with a cringe. "Talk about the touch of death. Anyway, Thrax then throws the boat into the throat, causing it to burn a bit. And then we cut to…the BRAIN!"

(Brain (Teen Titans): Hello Titans)

"Not that brain!" DJ yelled in annoyance.

(Brain (Pinkie and the Brain): Yes, quite)

"Not that one either!" DJ said in annoyance. "Anyway, in the brain, we meet up with Mayor Phlegmming, sort of the reason why Frank is so unhealthy. He seems to not care that much about it, but he does care that his opponent is getting higher on the polls then he is."

(Shows Leah Estrogen, working on a computer)

"And there's also Ozzy's love interest character, Leah. This girl does care a lot about Frank then her boss does, and seems to like Tom Colonic, the cell that looks a lot like John F. Kennedy." DJ then looked confused at this. "Try saying that last part ten times fast and try to make it make sense."

(Billy the germ: Mr. Colonic, what's that smell?)

"Your in the bowels, so…" DJ began, but was

(Tom: (chuckling a bit) Well, that's the smell of change (inhales) That's the smell of change)

"Gross…" DJ said, sicken a bit.

"Anyway, while it's revealed that Frank is getting ill, this is Phlegmming's idea…"

(Frank: I'll go take a cold Pill)

"Really? A cold pill is your big idea? The girl had a better idea to call a doctor, but you think a cold pill will work?" asked DJ, annoyed. "Might as well see how this train wreak works."

(Frank: (looking at a pill bottle) "Drixenol")

DJ then says "Anyway, thanks to Ozzy's little mishap in the legs, the chief, voiced by Joel Silver, decides to give Ozzy a partner to keep him in line. So Ozzy and Leah go to the stomach to meet up with the other hero of the movie…"
(Shows a red puff of smoke going into a large pipe-like thing that was sticking to the red and yellow pill)

DJ looked confused at this. "So…what's that red smoke?"

(IT shows a picture of the screen, as it shows the word that the gas is supposed to be; Cherries!)

DJ looked confused "Cherry gas? Weird…"

(Then it shows Drix coming out of the room, looking rather calm)

"Whom's the Megaman reject?" asked DJ, confused. He then remembers. "Oh yeah, this is Drixenol, or Drix if you want to be casual. David Hyde Pierce voices him. You know, the doctor guy from Treasure Planet who happens to be in a same-sex marriage? I wonder how he does Drix…"

(Drix: Drixenol: The Brand that eases coughs and sneezes)

"Man, that dude makes that sound cool?" asked DJ, surprised. "Seriously, Drix is a cool guy, but he seems to get a bit weird though…"

(Drix: I like to examine your irradiated areas)

DJ was surprised at this.

(Ozzy: Never on the first date, Drips)

DJ sighs and says "Drips? Really? That's like the weird nicknames that Davis gives TK on Digimon."

(Plays all the different moment when Davis messes up TK's name on purpose.)

"It gets annoying after awhile. So now Drix and Ozzy need to team up to fix the sore throat problem. But the two don't get along to well, since Drix is a educated guy, while Ozzy has been on the streets as a kid."

(Shows the sore throat)

"Yikes." Said DJ with a cringe. "That looks bad. Lucky for us, Drix comes with a ice shooter in his arm-cannon. Weird…"

(Drix: Inflammation and Glandular Swelling. (Smirks a bit) We meet again)

"You actually did this once?" asked DJ, confused. "Anyway, while ol. Drix is cleaning up the sore throat by putting the freeze on it."

(Steel: ICE PUNS!)

DJ looked confused at this. "Weird. Ozzy went to check on the boat that crashed near by. There, he seems to notice that something is a bit off. Why no one else went to check it out, I'll never know."

"There, he meets up with one of the most annoying germs in history…." DJ began.

(Suddenly the green germ from the boat jumps onto Ozzy, making him panic.)

DJ jumped a bit and says "What the hell is that thing? It looks like that green imp from We're Back a Dinosaur Story."

(Shows the little alien talking to Rex in a fast pace, making DJ annoyed)

"SHUT UP!" DJ said in annoyance. "Anyway, the critter is scared out of it's mine, since Thrax showed up and destroyed the ship they're on."

(The Green Germ: La Muerte Roja! He's coming man. I saw him (Makes hundreds of eyes come out of it's body))

DJ then says "But then Drix shows up to sooth the place and accidentally freezes the creature before it could explain more…)

(Shows a blast of icy liquid, freezing the creature)

(Voice Over: I WAS FROZEN TODAY!)

DJ chuckled and says, "That's a funny line. Anyway, inside of Bill Murray's Armpit…try saying that with a straight face, and we see…"

(Shows the sauna where the germs are in)

"Mafia Germs in towels in a giant steam-filled room. That's a clever idea…" DJ said, impressed. "But during business, Thrax shows up."

(Thrax: So this is where the scum of Frank comes to fester)

"Why does every villain make anything they say sound cool?" asked DJ, confused. "Listen to these."

(Maleficent: STAND BACK YOU FOOLS! (Laughs evilly as she vanished))

(Lord Zedd: I am Lord Zedd, emperor of all you see!)

(Joker: Why so serious?)

"See?" asked DJ, motioning to the last few things. "Anyway, Thrax takes down the mob leader with a swipe of his claws, making him the head honcho of the Mafia inside of frank."

"But I wonder…what kind of disease is Thrax? Because this is what he says about himself…" DJ began.

(Thrax: Ebola is a case of Dandruff compared to me!)

DJ then looked confused and got out a medical journal and looked up "Ebola". "Lets see…" he read about it and asks "A really bad disease is dandruff compared to him? Talk about tough."

"But enough of the cool animation, lets get back to the real world where Shane is meeting up with her uncle and father. She apparently wants her dad to come with her on the school hiking trip, but Frank is a bit reluctant because her teacher is mad at him…for which reasons we'll learn soon."

"But apparently Frank has other plans…but enough of that blandness, lets get back to the animation portion. At the…" DJ reads the screen. "Are they at the brain?"

(Gizmo: I'm not at his brain…I'm in his butt)

DJ looked surprised at this. "That joke aside, apparently Ozzy went to get a snack break and went to get some info on Thrax's disease type."

(Random Audience: What is it called?)

"Apparently the little imp said 'La Muerte Roja' which means 'the Red Death'. Wait, what?" asked DJ, confused.

(Suspense movie plays as the cover of the Edgar Allen Poe book "The Masque of the Red Death" is shown)

DJ then looked freaked, as he screamed and jumped out of a window and lands…after 15 minutes. "My lord this building is tall!"

DJ got back inside as he says "Anyway, in the real world, Frank goes through a garden while going to meet with his daughter, causing some pollen to fly into his nose."

(Shows the pollen particles going into Frank's nose)

"Those are weird. They make the Slimes from the Dragon Quest games look real." DJ said with surprise. "Apparently though Frank is allergic to Pollen. While some cells keep away the pollen away, Drix and Ozzy comes in."

(Drix: Quick! Jones, the dam is under attack!)

(Ozzy: Chill, pill. It's just some nose-shooters bogeying up some dust)

(Drix: Oh…)

"Over reacted there, Drix." DJ said plainly. "Anyway, Thrax kills the mechanic for the dam-if that makes sense-and then he tells his henchmen to break the dam."

(Germ: This is your big plan? A sore throat? A stuffy nose? People are going to think you're a…)

(Thrax: A Common Cold. Until I make my move, that's precisely what I want.)

DJ then says, "Man Thrax is cool. He makes Jafar look insignificant, and that's saying a lot."

(Jafar blasts DJ, causing his head to turn into Iago's)

"Not funny, Jafar." DJ said in Iago's voice, as he changes his head back to normal. "Anyway, a stray piece of pollen end up in Frank's nose. That might cause problems."

(Ozzy: In the immortal words of James Brown, get down!)

(Drix: James who?)

"This guy." Said DJ plainly.

(Shows a picture of James Brown)

"But that joke aside, Frank sneezes and then Drix went to fix up any 'problem' the dam got. And during that time, Frank decides to take his daughter on, get this, to a restaurant called 'Docky's'. That's a stupid name for a restaurant."

"But while Drix is testing the mucus-gross-Thrax decides to take out Ozzy and Drix for good." DJ said as he watched.

(Thrax: Hit all the Pressure valves. They're about the blow the scene.)

"A nose joke. Not what I was expecting." DJ said plainly. "Anyway, while Drix fixes the bursting dam, Thrax smirks down at Ozzy who saw him."

(Ozzy screams as the dam broke under him, causing a flood of snot to happen.)

"Gross. But before they can get 'blown out' by Frank, he snuffs them back into his nose. That was so disgusting I can't believe I said that." DJ said plainly, grossed out.

"And apparently enough, the mayor hates the idea of exercise. So he wants everyone to live happily in an unhealthy body. That is just wrong. But everyone seems to love this."

(Brian: undecided voters are the biggest idiots in the country)

"You got that right." DJ said with a nod. "Anyway, when Ozzy tries to tell the mayor about it, he wouldn't listen because of his record. And this is his threat."

(The Mayor: You'll find yourself in our next nosebleed. Understand?)

DJ looked shocked at this and asks "Why! Is! This! Guy! Still! In! Office? He makes Nixon seem like a saint!"

(Shows a Photoshop picture of Richard Nixon in a Church garb)

"Anyway, while Drix and Ozzy are talking, we find out what happened to Ozzy's record. Ozzy was in the stomach while Frank and Shane were at a school science fair. Odd." DJ said, looking both ways.

"But anyway, Frank ate some bad oyster and Ozzy went to check it out. During the science fair though, Frank meets up with Saturday Night Live's very own Molly Shannon, who is playing Shane's teacher. Who laughs to much."

(Shows Mrs. Boyd laughing too hard)

DJ then says "The doll joke wasn't even that funny. Anyway, while in the stomach, Ozzy saw a dangerous virus and went way to far with pressing the puke button."

(shows Frank vomiting)

"Gross!" DJ said, disgusted.

(Shows many people for the Total Drama Island show puking as well)

"Yeah, that's disgusting. Anyway, thanks to that, Frank became the city's joke and got fired from the soup factory. But he was able to get a job at the zoo thanks to his brother. But Ozzy kept asking himself this…"

(Ozzy: Did I do the right thing?)

"Well as Captain Planet would say…"

(Captain Planet: The power is yours!)

DJ nods and says "But Drix seems to agree with Ozzy and the two go out to find Thrax. But meanwhile, as Frank tells Shane about the trip, Leah tries to get Frank to go to where she wants to go; to the hike. But…that doesn't end well."

(Shows Frank showing Shane his toe: Don you get old.)

"Man, I never thought a Ghost Buster would go this low," sighed DJ. "Anyway though, everyone now thinks that Thrax is a cold…besides Ozzy and Drix."

"So where do they go? To a Flu Shot that is working in a shady part of Frank. But when Drix threatens him, Ozzy makes Drix seem nuts. I mean…just watch."

(Ozzy: (getting an idea) you done it now, Chill. He's Psycho Cop. It's to late now. He's on the Thorazine. He's cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs…"

(Sonny: I'm Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs! Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs!)

(Ozzy: He's going El Polo Loco on your crazy Behind (Drix does a almost evil smile at Chill, who is really scared))

"He's the Mad-Pill!" DJ said, in surprise. "But after freaking out the Flu Shot, they find out that Thrax and his pals are at a Zit on the forehead. So that's where evil cells hang out." DJ said, impressed.

(Ozzy: Next time, I'll be the bad cop.

Drix: You are a bad cop.

Ozzy: (Insulted) who you calling a bad cop?)

DJ then says "I smell a sitcom! But we'll get to that later, since now the two are heading for the zit, but thanks to Ozzy's shape shifting, he can pass himself off as a germ. But as for Drix's disguise…"

(Shows Drix wearing the frozen germ on his head)

"That's kind of embarrassing." DJ said, trying not to laugh. "Dude, at least cover up the giant "+" on your chest. But if you think his hat is embarrassing, just watch the cell's dance"

(Shows Drix dancing)

"Pills shouldn't dance…at all." DJ said plainly. "But while Ozzy and Drix try to find Thrax, Frank tries to talk to Mrs. Boyd, but she won't listen thanks to his embarrassment he gave her and her family. Talk about a grudge."

"But anyway, Ozzy was able to find his way into a meeting and found out how many people Mr. Red Death has caused."

(Thrax: See this? (Shows off a small piece of DNA) this DNA bead came from a girl in Riverdale, California. Didn't like to wash her hands. Took me Three weeks.)

(Scooby Doo: Ruh-oh)

(Thrax: (Shows another DNA bead) And this one. Nice Lady in Detroit, Motown. Six days flat)

(Shaggy: Zoikes!)

(Thrax: Then there's this old guy in Philly. I killed him in 72-hours.)

(Velma: Jinkies!)

DJ then asks "Wow…how long is he going to take out Frank in?"

(Thrax: I'll take him out in 48-hours! Get my chapter in the Medical book)

(Fred: (disappointed) Dang, I still don't have a catch phrase)

DJ then says "Anyway though, when Thrax asks who Germ-Ozzy really is…check out this stupid name he thinks of."

(Ozzy: Uh…a bad, big, booty-shaking pinkitosis.)

(Donkey and Puss look at each other and burst out laughing)

DJ was laughing a bit to and says "Now that sounds stupid! But after he got hit on the back by ol. One-eye there, Thrax was about to kill Ozzy, but thank to the lord above that Drix saved him!"

(Drix: Attention Germs. You are Surrounded! Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh uh-huh. Surrounded)

"Never do those again, please." DJ said. "But anyway, before Ozzy and Drix can fight them off, and after the imp thaws out FINALLY, the teacher and Frank are still in their argument."

(Frank: Can you just lift the restraining order so I can go on the Father Daughter trip?

Mrs. Boyd: The answer is no.)

"Lady you don't have to like him! Just lift it up and let him go on his own group! It'll be better off for Shane's own good. Man, she makes Ms. Finster from Recess seem nice!"

"But then…Ozzy literally blows up the zit, hoping to kill Thrax for good. Man, that's a bit over board."

(Imp: (Seeing icy explosion) Oh no. Not again! (Screams as he was frozen))

(Voice over: I was frozen…again!)

"But that explosion caused the zit to explode onto Mrs. Boyd's lip, finally making her angry. But it seems that Thrax is finally defeated!"

(Ozzy: My name is what?
Drix: Jones
Ozzy: My name is who?
Drix: Jones!
Ozzy: My name is…OSMOSIS JONES!)

"But after they leave…"

(Shows Thrax hanging on a piece of exploded flesh, as some imperial music plays)

"THRAX IS ALIVE!" DJ said, shocked. "That is one tough plague. But…after that little incident, The mayor fired Ozzy and tells Drix to get out of Frank. Man, this guy is one of the baddies, isn't he?

(shows the Gas station where Thrax is hiding out in)

"But that isn't the half of it; Thrax is ready to kill Frank. But want to know what he does to his men?"

(Shows the gas station is blown up)

"Holy crud! Seems he does what the Monarch would do!"

(DJ voice over: The monarch is not pleased (the Gas station blows up))

"And what does Thrax say about his partners?"

(Thrax: Medical Books aren't written about losers.)

"Says the guy being voiced by Cowboy Curtis from Pee-Wee's Playhouse" DJ said in a bored tone. "Anyway, Shane is still going to the trip, without Frank, and even mentions that she blames their eating habits on why her mother died."

(Frank: honey…your mother died…because she got sick.)

"Oh gee, I wonder how that could happen. It isn't like she could've eaten better." DJ said in plain sarcasm. "But anyway, seems our Dynamic Duo is breaking up."

(Drix: (sadden) Well, I…I guess I should be going.

Ozzy: Yeah…)

DJ nods and says, "Talk about a sad way huh? Ozzy is going on jobless and Drix is getting booted out. That is harsh." "But anyway, while Frank is asleep, Ozzy wanders the city while Thrax is traveling all over to find the brain. But it's not like he's…"

(Shows the fence was melted by Thrax while no one was looking)

"Is already there…oh snap." DJ said, looking nervous.

(Daphne: Jeepers!)

"Alright, enough Scooby Doo jokes." DJ said plainly. "Anyway, while Ozzy is at some sort of dream theater, we see posters of…what the heck?"

(Gets a close up of a poster of Bob and Shane…in weeding clothes!)

DJ went wide-eyed as the Pedophile alarm went off. He gets out his cell phone says "We got a problem! A father is having some sort of sick nightmare about his daughter and brother. Hurry!" He then looked panicked.

(Ozzy: That's right big boy, just keep on dreaming. At least you got your health.)

(Thrax breaks into the brain area and kills the scientists.)

the Wah-wah music plays as DJ just shrugs. "Anyway, Thrax corrupts the core of Frank and gets out a DNA Bead, causing his whole body to get out of whack. And it seems that the mayor doesn't even care enough to go and look."

(Leah: You care about your stupid reelection then you did do for our lives.)

"THANK YOU!" DJ yelled. "Anyway, Thrax finds his way into Frank's subconscious and trust me…it's weird."

((Shows all the images.)

"And I thought I had weird dreams." Said DJ plainly. "But it seems that Thrax is really confused about this, and even gives the hint to Ozzy, while giving…"

(Shows the Exam dream Ozzy was watching, while it turned red)

"A fever dream."

(Rimshot)

"Anyway, Thrax finally gets out, and I bet he's freaked." DJ said.

(Thrax: This cat was sick before I even got here)

"You got that right." DJ said with a nod. "Anyway Drix is now at the bladder-gross-and is about to leave frank via the toilet. Seriously, this movie just got gross."

"But want to know how Ozzy tries to convince Drix to stay?" asked DJ.

(Ozzy: I've known sugar pills that can cure cancer, just because they believed.)

DJ looked confused and asks "Say what? Sugar Pills can cure cancer? Why hasn't the scientists known this?"

(Peter: Why aren't we funding this?)

DJ sighs and says "Seems the partner ship ends."

(the yellow water goes down some sort of Drain, while Ozzy looks down)

"That is harsh; a best friend, going down the toilet…literally." DJ sighed.

(Drix: Jones?)

DJ perked up at this. "Seems that Drix is back!"

(Drix: Did you really know a suger pill that cured cancer?)

(Ozzy: Nah, but it makes a good pep talk.)

"Jerk." DJ said plainly "Anyway, while Ozzy and Drix…"

(The Ozzy and Drix plays for a few seconds before stopping)

DJ shrugs and says "Anyway...while Ozzy and Drix went to look around, it seems that Frank is feeling ill while Shane goes to the hiking trip. Oh boy…"

"But anyway, while Frank and Bob get ready to go, Thrax kidnaps Leah while everyone is in a panic over the ever-close death of Frank. But anyway, Shane is on her trip while Frank is getting worse."

"Anyway, Ozzy and Drix follow the trail to the uvula…"

(Ozzy: What the heck is a uvula?)

(Drix: It's the little dangling thing inside of Frank's-)

(Ozzy: Boxer shorts got it!)

DJ was surprised as he says "You know, a family film. Anyway, after finding out where the uvula really is at, they head there while Frank is getting worse. Bob FINALLY gets a good idea."

(Bob: That's it! We're getting you to the hospital. The trip is off.)

(Mayor: The trip is off? NOO! (Does a close up of his mouth))

"Oh shut up, dude." DJ said in annoyance. "Anyway, Shane sees her father being taken to the hospital. This might not end well."

(Sam: No chizz)

"Anyway, at the hospital, Thrax was able to get out via the pollen pod that he was able to save from before. With it, he was able to escape, but Ozzy followed him thanks to Drix. But not before…"

(Shows Ozzy kissing Leah, while the obnoxious audience in a back ground plays)

"After Ozzy and Thrax get outside of Frank-didn't know a blood cell can last that long out there-they went right onto…Shane's eye?"

(Shows the two splashing right onto the surface of Shane's eye, as it backed up)

"Nice CGI." DJ said, impressed. "Anyway, it's time for the final battle!"

(shows the fight scene between Ozzy and Thrax, and some matrix affects going in to)

"Nice!" said DJ, "These two are really good, but it seems the end is near…"

(Thrax: (Seeing his hand is free of the ice) You know what Jones, you want this chain so bad…(goes behind Ozzy and ties the chain around his neck) Big Daddy Thrax is gonna give it to ya!)

"But before our blood cell hero can become protoplasm, he is saved thanks to a tear that is forming in Shane's eye. They end up right on the false eye lash.."

(Ozzy: (After checking) It's a falsie. (Thrax then stabs him))

"Ah dude! Right in the Nucleus!" DJ said, surprised. "But anyway, before Thrax can kill Ozzy, he gets stuck on the other side, while Ozzy just slips out-hey, he's a living liquid, what can you do?-and Thrax ends up in a cup of Alcohol."

(Shows Thrax dying in the alcohol.)

"I know the joke you want…"

(Wicked Witch voice over: I'm melting! I'm Melting! Oh what a world! What a world!)

"But that joke aside, Thrax is beaten, Shane is forced to get taken outside while everyone inside of Frank panics."

(Shows the reporters fighting, the mayor letting a single tear fall like the captain from the Titanic, and a band playing "Amazing Grace" and Leah, Drix and the Chief looking downhearted)

"Oh boy, this isn't good." DJ sighed.

(Shane: (After running back by her seemingly dead father) Daddy! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to say it! I don't blame you at all for Mom's death. I didn't mean it. You're the greatest dad in the whole world! (Continues to cry))

DJ sighs as he says "Oh boy…"

(shows all the Pokemon from Pokemon the First movie crying)

(Then shows Doopey crying on Doc's shoulder)

(then it shows a bunch of crying dogs at the pound in Lady and the Tramp)

DJ then says "But all hope is not lost! Ozzy was able to hitch a ride into Shane's tear and bring back the DNA bead!"

(shows the Dwarves celebrating, then other happy moments)

"Anyway, after saving Frank, what does the man say to his daughter after coming back?" asked DJ.

(Frank: (sounding tired) your mama says "Hi")

DJ then says "alright!" as the hallelujah music plays. "Anyway, after saving Frank, Ozzy is back on the force."

(Chief: so Jones, can I count on you to keep Frank in shape? (Gives Ozzy his badge) We got that Insurance exam next month.

Ozzy: (thinking about it) I'm not sure; you might need to talk to my new Partner. If he feels like hanging around.

Drix: But my work visa's expired.

Ozzy: We'll head to the hemorrhoid and get you a good lawyer.)

"And as for the big romantic scene?" asked DJ. "Coming up."

(Leah: Come here baby. I'm still Jonesing for a little more Osmosis. (Kisses Ozzy, as he eagerly kisses back))

"Anyway, at the climax of the whole movie, Shane and Frank finally go on that hike, and it's the last time we see that annoying mayor." DJ said with a smirk.

(Ex-Mayor (I wanted to call him that for awhile now): (Sees a button that says "Do Not Push") I wonder what this does? (He looks around and pushes it, and screams as he gets sucked into a gas-bubble))

DJ then says "And what's the moral of this story? Yakko!"

(Yakko: Wheel of Morality; Turn, turn, turn. Tell us the lesson we should learn.)

DJ gets a piece of paper out and says "And the moral of the story is…"

(Frank: Out with the old and in with the new)

"No…but that's a good one. It says "Don't use the 'Ten Second Rule' or else you might end up sick.'" Said DJ.

"Anyway, that's Osmosis Jones. How did it hold up?" asked DJ.

(Shows scenes from the animated parts of the movie)

"This movie had a great Animated segments. The coloring is great; the designs for the city are incredible, and the partnership of Ozzy and Drix is awesome."

(Then shows the live action parts)

"But I think it could've done without the live-action parts." DJ said plainly. "Everyone but Bill Murray and the girl playing Shane were quite dull. Bill is still really well in this role, and the girl even acts like a real daughter to the guy. But what's surprising is that Bill Murray is quite out of shape."

"But from what I heard, he got way into character and even went as far as look unhealthy for the role of Frank. Now that is dedication to a role!" DJ said, impressed. "Anyway, all in all; Good movie, amazing animation, but bitter-sweet live action."

"I'm the Demon Critic, and I'm hungry for something." DJ said, rubbing his stomach. "I think an apple will do."

Movie stats

Pros: Good animation, good choice for Bill Murray and the voice cast, Thrax is an awesome villain, and Ozzy is really funny.

Cons: Live action parts boring, can get gross at times, and some of the jokes about the body were quite weird.

Rating: ***1/2 out of 5

Warner bros owns Osmosis Jones

(Thrax: Ebola is a cause of Dandruff compared to me!)

End of Review

There's the review of Osmosis Jones. If anyone has any ideas for my next review, let me know.